Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Happy Halloween? Bah

I hate this holiday. I hate it, hate it, hate it. Why? 'Cause every 15 minutes the darn doorbell rings. I don't know about you, but we have a very LOUD doorbell. Since the house isn't all that big, it's loud everywhere in the house, even in my laundry basket. So, I'm in the closet, nicely curled up in the Mom's laundry, and the doorbell keeps on ringing. How is a girl supposed to sleep? After a while, it becomes a royal pain.

Some of the Brats are happy about it because all these kids knocking at the door means lots of pets and new smells. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. I just want some peace and quiet. Is that too much to ask for?

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Fried Monkee Butt

I swear. Monkee is turning into a real weirdo. Yesterday he was sitting in the frying pan on the stove, doing nothing but sitting there. Why? I have no freaking clue. Weird cat.

P.S. The Mom says to ignore the messy stove. It's the Dad's turn to clean it and we all know how much male humans love to clean.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Well I Was Comfortable...

Last night, I was sleeping on the Mom's pillow, all nice and comfortable, when all of a sudden Loki plops down on me. Not only is he on top of me, he spreads himself all over the pillow. As you can image, I'm stuck under this moose cat and not all too thrilled with it. The Mom tried to make me feel better by cooing at me and petting me, thinking how "cute" this way. I wonder if she'll think it so "cute" when I poop in her shoes tomorrow morning?

After a while, I realized that I was kind of stuck in the situation so I just gave up and went to sleep. Then, about five minutes later, the Mom decides to move all the pillows to "make it easier" for us to "sleep together on the pillows." You know what this means? Both Loki and I went flying as she moved the pillows. At this point I was really mad and just stomped away to go sleep in the laundry basket.

On the bright side, the Mom is really miserable now. She's off grading papers. I can tell that the class did a miserable job because she's moaning and complaining as she's reading them. Hehe.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

It's Official...

...the Mom is now a true Nerd (according to her).

Earlier this week, she got promoted from being a Library Assistant to being a Librarian. I thought humans needed a special degree for this but the town she works for is so small that anybody can be one.

This is really cool 'cause it means she gets paid lots more money--which means more Stinky Goodness for me--but according to the Mom it also increases her Nerd factor. I have no clue what a Nerd is, but if the Mom is one, it can't be all that bad. She nice, and smart, and knows how to treat me right most of the time (it's not perfect because she keeps bringing in Brats).

The Mom is really happy about this promotion 'cause she seems to really like the job and the people she works with. If she's happy, I'm happy. Just so long as she remembers to give me the daily minimum requirement of attention I need each day. Oh ya, and my Stinky Goodness.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Sick is Bad

On Friday night, the Mom said she felt a "tickle" in her throat. Personally, I thought she just swallowed a bunch of cat hairs, but in human terms that means she thinks she was getting sick.

And sick she was. The Mom didn't get out of bed the entire day. She even fell asleep during the Leafs game last night (she never misses Hockey Night in Canada), which means she really must not have felt good.

I did my feline duty of sleeping on her head all day, but I guess she didn't delegate her human duties to the Dad. You see, I DID NOT GET MY STINKY GOODNESS yesterday. Nope. None. Nada. Zilch. Now I'm not blaming the Mom 'cause she was really sick. But hello? Dad? What were you doing all day? Couldn't you have given us Stinky Goodness?

When the Mom got up this morning, she realized the error and made sure that we got our Stinky Goodness. She gave me and Frankie lots of pets and apologized. I'll forgive her. This time.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Some days...

...I just can't win.

It's bad enough that the Mom isn't home all the time now to give me my Stinky Goodness when I want it, right?

Well, the other night, the Dad got home before the Mom so I figured I would go and yowl at him until he fed me. Simple, eh? So, I perch myself up on top of the Mom's scrapbooking case and was about to yowl at the Dad when I'm all of a sudden knocked over by Frankie. It seems he was on one of his typical nip-highs and spazzing out. Normally that doesn't bother me, but this time he was preventing me from my duty of yowling for food. That's not cool. I turned around and yelled "oh no...you did not just do that!" and thwapped him back into sobriety.

By the time I regained the appropriate mental state for a good yowl, the Dad had already walked into the other room. Once he sits down for the evening, nothing is going to budge him. My moment was lost and I was forced to wait for the Mom, who didn't come home until two hours later.


Saturday, October 07, 2006

No Sneeze Kitties? What the...

The Mom was reading the New York Times and saw this article about genetically mutated hypo-allergenic kitties. OK, they are kitties, but they are mutant kitties. I'm sorry. It's bad enough that the humans add growth hormones to Moo-cows and change the genetics on corn to make it more durable (or something like that).

This is so freaking stupid.

Oh ya, you can give me the whole argument of "well this means people can enjoy the company of cats who couldn't before." Two problems with this. One, if they really loved cats, they would put up with the sneezies. Heck, the Dad is highly allergic to cats and he's still with the Mom six years and nine cats later. He loves all of us, including the Annoying one who is a huge bundle of allergy causing snot. Secondly, there are so many kitties out there who need homes. Why should some idiot spend $4,000 on a cat when there are so many loving little furballs at the shelters who can go home right now for the cost of dinner at a fast food place?

*steps off soap box and goes to thwap someone*